Manly Nonnegotiables/Womanly Expectations

I was doing some thinking and realized, most of my single girlfriends have some outlandish expectations when it comes to the ideal man. Please note: I said “ideal,” not perfect. They expect a man to make a ton of money, yet be in his early to mid 30s. They expect him to live in a mansion, with gold plated toilet seats, and recite poetry, and sing, and be a great dancer, and like ALL their friends, but not want to hump any of them. They want a man who’s well-educated, well-read, supports Obama, exercises regularly enough to have a body like the dude who played Thor in The Avengers. They want him to be “cultured” (whatever that means), black with white friends, but still able to kick it in the hood. They want him to be a Christian, and attend bible study with them every Wednesday, but put it in their butt on Thursdays.

Okay, I know that list seems ridiculous, but I’ve heard all of those expectations, at least once. Well, maybe not the gold plated toilet seats, but everything else.

That man DOES NOT EXIST in real life. Maybe in a Tyler Perry movie, but not in this wonderful place called reality! And if he did exist, do you know how annoying that would be to try to keep up with that type of perfection?! It might be fine for a week, a month, maybe even a month and 3 days, but the minute you have to fart in front of him, all bets are off.

So, I decided to come up with my 3 nonnegotiables every date-able man must have.

1. The ability to parallel park quickly, efficiently, and while carrying on a conversation
2. Fearlessness in the face of rodents and any type of insect
3. Able to listen…better yet, the ability to convince me he’s listening

I don’t want to say lower your expectations when it comes to shopping for a mate. What I do think folks need to do is walk in with no expectations.
No Expectations = No Disappointment
Just a thought from a reformed ho…


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