Day 2: I am Angry

Today I almost shook the shit out of the woman in front of me in line at Subway.  I stood behind her as she ordered her 3rd sandwich, literally.  She kept on asking the “Sandwich Artist” dumb questions such as “what goes with italian bread?” and “what do most people put on the cold cut […]

Gary Coleman, Young

Fat People and Weight Loss Advice

Take my advice. I don’t use it anyway. Fat people. Single people. Broke people. And, finally, non-comedians. Everyday, I am bombarded by someone’s advice – usually unsolicited, irrelevant, and just plain dumb. I’ve learned to dodge conversations, that start off with “you know what you should talk about on stage?” like Neo dodges bullets in […]

Formerly Fat

So sorry for the lack-o-post! I’ve had lack-o-time since there was lots-o-work to be D-U-N (that means ‘done’). Anywhos, figured since I was working so much, I would show you guys me in action, at one of my [many] jobs. I’ve been slaving over this bit for a few months now, and I *think* (fingers […]

Curvy vs. Fat

I got into a discussion, rather a disagreement…okay, an argument, with a male coworker who referred to one of our female coworkers as “curvy” and “thick.” The bitch was fat. Point blank. Period. End of story. The fat lady sang…better yet, she sang. His definition of fat was “can’t walk.” What?! “Can’t walk?!” You CAN’T […]